Rhode Island | Women’s Resource Center

Dunia thought she had it all – a family she loved, a warm and cozy house, and a doting husband. And, for the first years of her relationship with her husband, this was true. Then, something changed after they got married, and the abuse began. In the beginning, she said, it was mainly verbal arguments and emotional abuse, but soon, escalated to physical violence. When her husband pushed her against a wall and tried to choke her while she was in the third trimester of her first pregnancy, Dunia began to see how deep-rooted the violence was.

After 7 years of being kicked, punched, spit on, and verbally abused, Dunia had had enough, and she made one call that would change her life.

Dunia was first referred by the Rhode Island Department of Human Services to the Women’s Resource Center. There, she requested a Child Support Waiver to help support her children. The Advocate met Dunia when she was five months pregnant and visibly fearful of her abuser, despite having escaped. Due to her cultural beliefs, she’d never told anyone in her family about what she was going through, especially her parents, and never dared to call the police.

Once Dunia reached out to an Advocate within the Women’s Resource Center and shared that she finally got the courage to call the police, she felt she was finally able to overcome her abuser. In light of her recent success, Dunia felt it was possible to let her parents in on the secret she had kept all these years. Once Dunia shared with her parents what had been going on, she realized that her parents would always support her unconditionally, as they asked that she and two children move to live with them.

By the time of the second reassessment, Dunia disclosed that she was feeling more empowered and independent, and stronger and with a better self-esteem. These feelings allowed her to go back to school, while still working full time. She acknowledged the tremendous support she was getting from her parents and the assistance from the Family Violence Option Advocacy Program (FVOAP) and expressed her gratitude. However strong she felt, Dunia was conscious that she was not yet ready to face her abuser, and asked for a continuation of the child support waiver.

When our Advocate met with her once again six months later, Dunia joyfully talked about her good grades at school, that her kids were doing great, and her parents were enjoying their time with their grandchildren while supporting her one hundred percent.

Dunia was ecstatic to be free her abuser for good when her husband eventually filed for divorce. She truly feels she is capable to live without him and provide for her children with a healthy and safe environment to grow up in.

Last month, Governor Raimondo signed legislation to keep guns away from domestic abusers. As Rep. Teresa Tanzi stated, “At last, victims of domestic abuse in Rhode Island will not have the constant fear of knowing that the person who abused them still has a gun.”

As if the abuse itself is not enough to cause constant, paralyzing fear, adding guns to the mix is like adding fuel onto a fire. Abused women are five times more likely to be killed by their abuser if the abuser owns a firearm. It’s a simple fact that guns in the hands of any person with a history of violence can only lead to tragedy.

Case in point is the recent Texas church massacre. The gunman was convicted and jailed for assaulting his wife repeatedly and beating his infant stepson until he suffered a fractured skull. He spent time in a mental institution, was booted from the military for bad conduct, stalked and harassed ex-girlfriends and was sentenced for animal cruelty for beating a puppy. His long resume of violence dates back to middle school.

Despite all of these warning signs and a well-documented dark past for such a young person, he was able to amass a gun collection that he used to kill dozens of innocent souls – including those of a pregnant woman, her unborn child and numerous children. If you knew what you now know about this shooter, would you have in good conscience had any part in selling him a gun? If he could beat up a puppy and an infant with his bare hands, what would he have done with a gun in his possession? Unfortunately, we – and the 26 dead, the numerous injured, their families and our grieving nation – know the answer.

It’s time we stop putting guns into the hands of those who cannot handle themselves. Support gun legislation to stop the violence and protect innocent lives, before it happens again.

By Lori N. DiPersio, Executive Director

Women’s Resource Center serving Newport and Bristol Counties

Women’s Resource Center

Tag Archives: Rhode Island

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